Anxious! Anxious! Anxious!

It has been one week since Judy and I spoke about the Huntsville, AL opportunity. Since that conversation, I've completed an online Introduction to Proposals course, and I've registered for an in-classroom Developing Competitive Proposals course in San Francisco. The class is on December 2 and 3. From my last blog, you already know that the proposal part of the job requirement was the one area in which I had zero experience. You also know that Judy was planning on consulting with her Regional Manager and team about my lack in experience. I emailed Judy to inquire if she thought the course would increase my chances. I emailed her on Tuesday of this week. I have not heard back from her at all. She did inform me that she will be on travel this week. She also let me know that she will be on travel next week, with the exception of Monday and Friday. At this point, I'm really hoping she will at least answer my latest email about whether or not the proposal course will help my chances. Even if it doesn't, I'll still take the course. It's good information to know and the skills I will learn will be utilized at one point or another in my career. I just want this so badly that I'm driving myself crazy.

Adding to my anxiety is the fact that John has started the series of Sleep Study appointments needed to determine if he has a sleep disorder. Basically, he cannot remember a time when he could stay asleep the whole night. Also, his body undergoes a twitching spell as he is going to sleep. Most of the time, he doesn't even know it's happening - but I feel all the twitching. The fact that he never gets a good night's sleep effects him during the day. He is chronically tired. The issue is not falling asleep. People who know him have probably witnessed him drifting off to sleep at sporting events, parties, during movies, etc. He could be sitting up and talking one minute, and be sleeping the next minute. It's not quite narcolepsy, because he is aware that it is happening. He attended his first appointment yesterday.

It was at this appointment where he was told that they are about 95% sure he has Obstructive Sleep Apnea. Due to the way certain parts of his nasal cavity and mouth are shaped or sized, his airways are obstructed as he sleeps. He found out that his tongue is way too big for his mouth, his uvula is elongated, (the uvula is the long thing that hangs down at your throat), his tonsils are too large, and his septum (in his nose) is too small. There are two types of surgery; one which is about 50% effective and the second that is about 90% effective. The surgeries involved breaking the jaw and realigning it to fit his tongue, drilling a hole in the jaw, and some other stuff that doesn't sound very fun. The non-surgical option is 100% effective: wearing the Sleep Apnea mask that is hooked up to a machine while he sleeps. This mask blows air through his nasal/mouth cavities to keep these areas open. We both like this option best!

At this very informative appointment, he was told that he would need to make a series of about five appointments to complete the Sleep Study process. He told them that we could be moving at the end of December, so these five appointments would need to happen rather quickly. The first of the five is happening this Sunday. This will be his first of two overnight studies. He will be hooked up to machines that will monitor brain-waves, breathing, and other nervous system activities as he sleeps. He is to be there by 9pm on Sunday. The study will be over at 5:30am on Monday and he will be free to go home at 7:00am, following some questions. After this appointment, he has some more appointments with the specialist that he met with yesterday. Then, he has another overnight stay. This series normally occurs over three months. Since we could be moving, they will now need to occur much sooner!

Just to be clear, the actual results of these tests and the actual tests themselves are not adding to my anxiety. It will be exciting for John to actually SLEEP when he goes to bed at night. It will be exciting to see the effects of getting good sleep will have on his mood, behavior, etc. I'm anxious about it because this is something that must be scheduled around whether or not I get the job in Huntsville. It's an added "unknown."

I'm a planner. I plan out everything. In case we do get to move, I have an apartment in mind I'd like to apply for, I have a moving company in mind, and I have a date in mind that I would like the movers to come. If we get to move, I have wedding coordinating options in mind. A person to pick up my dress, a way I can get back here in February for a dress fitting and my Bridal Shower, dance lessons shoved in on weekends up until we leave, so we're ready, etc. I do know that I'll be sad that I'll need to cancel plans with my family in Florida that last week of December, but I also feel it will be an awesome gift to be able to move this Christmas season. The downfall of all this planning is that it gets my hopes up.

Life is exciting - that's for sure!